Throwback: First Day of Kindergarten

August 16, 2024

If I could turn back the hands of time, I really would.

August 31, 1992. My first day of Kindergarten.

I needed a footstool to reach the bathroom sink while brushing my teeth. Truth be told, I still do sometimes 😂—some things never change.

Mornings meant strawberry Pop-Tarts or powdered donuts for breakfast, and a brown paper lunch bag packed with a simple PB&J sandwich 🥪, a Hi-C juice box, chips, and Dunkaroos. Life was uncomplicated then.

I was obsessed with Scooby-Doo, LEGOs, Lincoln Logs, riding my Big Wheel up and down the driveway, and the pure joy of a Happy Meal from McDonald’s.

I always knew I was adopted. And I often felt different.

Walking into a classroom where I was the only Asian kid made that difference feel impossible to ignore. I didn’t yet have the words for it, but I felt it in my bones.

So what would I tell my younger self?

That small Filipino boy with dimples like no other. Shy, timid, but quietly ready to take on the world.

Sometimes, it’s the people who appear to love themselves the most who are actually struggling to love themselves at all.

If I could tell my younger self one thing, it would be this:

To truly love ourselves, we must first learn to love the little person inside us.

The child who felt discouraged.
The child who felt different.
The child who lived with the fear of never being good enough.

We must hold that little person close. Pull them onto our laps. Whisper softly in their ear, “Everything will be okay. I’m here now. And I will never leave.”

And when we do that, when we show up for that child, we become the love for ourselves that we once needed most.